The Beat Of My Heart

I am feeling my heart tonight, and some of my soul, and it is a unique experience. I feel so charmed. I feel sexy and fun. I feel honest and vulnerable and honored. I feel inspired and awed and humbled. I feel red and magenta and dark pink, and I see those colors streaming into my heart at the speed of the Rail. I feel so connected, and so light while being so heavy, and beautiful and peaceful. I feel as deep as the Marianas Trench tonight. And all of these beautiful aspects of myself I am feeling because I am allowing myself to cautiously but benevolently connect with a man who I am so inspired by...someone who is, in my eyes, the most powerful man we will see in the coming decades.

Floating, falling, sweet intoxication
Touch me, trust me, savor each sensation
You alone can make my song take flight
Help me make the music of the night

--By Andrew Lloyd Webber, from the song "Music of the Night," from the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack

Lately, I've just been incredibly shallowly attracted to men. Like, I wanted to fuck 'em, but in the end, I'd rather not even put forth the effort for them...but with him, it is crazy...I am practicing myself being true authentic Me, and I'm always succeeding. I feel beautiful around him.

I forgot how good it feels...I had closed myself off so hardcore before Alex (my ex-fiancee), and even more so after Alex. I couldn't feel true love. And now, having done Relationships training at Great Life, and having moved, and having begun claiming who I really TRULY am and want to be, I have really opened myself back up again...I've torn myself open, and it feels really cool to feel like this again!

[They] used to speak of an angel...
I used to dream he'd appear.
Now as I sing I can sense him
And I know he's here...

Here in this room, he calls me softly
Somewhere inside, hiding
Somehow I know he's always with me
He, the unseen genius

--By Andrew Lloyd Webber, from the song "Angel of Music," from the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack

Thank you for being you. Thank you for allowing my heart into yours, and yours into mine. I know how scary that can be, and, in fact, am experiencing that along with you. You are such a large piece of beauty in my life. I am blessed on a personal level to mingle in your energy. I am intensely grateful for you on a worldview level because I know you will bring about such immense change and progress to our nation and our world. I am excited to see the world welcome your beauty, grace, eloquence and generosity as honestly as I have.

Love, Peace and Kisses to everyone,

Apollo